The gruesome details

OK, I did promise I would fill in all the gruesome details of why I went missing between 8/30 and 9/6. I had emergency gall bladder surgery on 9/2 after checking into the local hospital emergency room on 9/1. They let me out on 9/3 and I just couldn't sit up for any length of time without my back hurting like a son of a gun until 9/6.

I'm perfectly fine and almost completely normally mobile with the same ravenous appetite and appreciation for food I've always had. I just can't quite fit into my clothes just yet. I own nothing but slacks and they button right where the hole in my belly button is so wearing them is still uncomfortable. Since I have a desk job, there's no reason I can't go back to work . . . except the clothes issue. I just don't think anyone would really appreciate me walking around the office with my pants unbuttoned and unzipped. It might cause talk.

Now I'm sure those of you who've known people with peckish gall bladders are probably wondering why I had emergency surgery since most people have all sorts of lovely symptoms to indicate they have a problem and they schedule their surgery at their convenience. Well, that's because I've never been most people. Until the agony struck Wednesday morning, I had not a single symptom. I left work around 11:30 a.m. and went home to rest. I had my son take me to the emergency room at about 1:30 p.m. The pain I felt was right up there with labor.

They checked me in, ran blood work, a urine analysis, an ultrasound, and scheduled surgery for Thursday morning. Wham bam, thank you, ma'am.

Thursday afternoon, after the surgery, the surgeon came to see me. He told me my gall bladder was in such bad shape that if I'd waited another day or two it would have been gangrenous. I don't think he believed me when I told him I hadn't had nausea or vomiting and that there hadn't been any pain until Wednesday morning. Oh, well. The nasty little beggar is gone and I'm all set to get back to normal . . . once I fit into my slacks again.